The Space Between

The Space Between
The tears we cry
Is the laughter that keeps us coming back for more
The Space Between
The wicked lies we tell
Is the hope to keep us safe from pain
Dave Matthews Band ~ The Space Between

Well since this last review obviously brought up the subject so I am going to try and expound upon it.

In Romance or in books with strong Romantic Elements, and I am talking either M/M or M/F here, I love the dark flawed Hero as much as anyone. Nothing provides a stronger picture of a character, nothing keeps us as well away from the dreaded “Mary Sue”, nothing provides easier fodder for conflict or angst than a few well placed and intelligently used character flaws.

The problem then for me as the Romance reader comes into play when the author is trying to shock me with something even darker or more “real” or more flawed to make their Hero stand out while trying to eventually sell me an HEA (Happily Ever After) or even an HFN (Happy For Now). Did they leave enough room for me to find redemption in the Hero?

I think this all ties into the writer being sensitive to what flawed behavior the general Romance reader is going to find forgivable. How well they couch the flawed behavior or how well they sell the moment of redemption for the Hero.

Which all brings me to the main point.
What are my Thou Shalt Nots?

I think there are at least three…

1. Rape Scene

Yes, I think most of the old school Romance Rape scenes falls right in here.
I am not talking about the “No means Yes” scene or the “forceful Alpha” scene (which can be explored and analyzed but I am not going to do that here.) but the out right, full on, Deliverance style “NO” Rape scene. Why do you think the guys all remember that scene? Because that was a Male Rape scene, that’s why. Maybe this was allowed once upon a time before Date Rape and Marriage Rape etc etc etc. Just no, be very careful in even implying this. No HEA or even HFN can be sold to me with this one.

2. Threats Of Suicide Scene

Either implied by actions or announced verbally. NO! I hate this type of Passive Aggressive Emotional Bullshit worse than even the sickest form of Physical Abuse ever written. It’s evil, It’s betrayal, It’s poison, It’s abusive, It leaves scars people… It makes me throw books and foam at the mouth and want to personally send the writer to a time out corner while explaining in no uncertain terms how much they have just FAILED for even attempting to write something they think is a Romance. Can you understand you just pushed my face into a big old steaming pile of shit I like to call the worst most confusing moment I ever dealt with in my entire life at the hands of someone I thought loved me? NO HEA for you, not even the most weakest halfhearted HFN can be sold to me with this one.

3. Physical Or Verbal Abuse Done In Anger Scene

The last big one on my short list here. Now you might know that I do recommend Longhorns an M/M Western Romance by Victor J. Banis that includes a fight scene early in the book between the hyper-masculine Cowboy Heroes. But notice, it happens BEFORE they actually get together or confess their affection. There is a big difference in my mind to a hyper-masculine man who was raised to “let off steam” in a fight with another guy (Just as capable of fighting back.) at the local watering hole and a man who takes out his aggressions on those he loves or those weaker than him. It’s the same difference between a BDSM Scene and a Torture Scene. (Safe, Sane, Consensual versus Horror Movie.) or the difference between a parent hitting their child in anger or spanking them to punish. Maybe these dualities make you uncomfortable to think about but there are differences in motivations for these actions. If these actions are shown in writing though I hope they are clearly defined for the reader.

Once Physical or Verbal Abuse or “lashing out in anger” enters the picture the actual Romance is so over with for me. No excuse allows that type of Abuse to happen in my opinion. So what if the Hero had a bad day, or his dog died, or his house burned to the ground… SO FUCKING WHAT? Any trust, as far as I am concerned, has been proven to be misplaced or is irrevocably decimated. The Hero might be the most sparkling perfect character I have ever read but I am over it the minute he lays one finger in anger on his lover or his child. Even under the Good Old Boy rules I was raised with the “Hero” is not a man, he is not accepted among the ranks, he is scum that should be scrapped off the bottom of your shoe immediately. Unless you are gonna tell me the whole scene was perceived wrong, there is no room for redemption. No HEA or even HFN can be sold to me with this one.

Anyway, that is why in my reviews even if I recommend the book I will try my best to point out the issues I have that might touch upon these elements. I am also always open to hearing other people’s Thou Shalt Nots too.

Take my hand
Cause we’re walking out of here
Right out of here

Tags: eBook Commentary, Gay Romance